The Guy List: Kay Hymowitz
By The Editors

We believe in equality for all. But that doesn't mean we are all the same. For example, here's a woman who's just better than the rest.

The Guy List: Kay Hymowitz


Women who love a planned man certainly exist.

Take our friend Kay. She knows a good man is a man with a plan.

Why she’s one of us:

As Guy Shepherd explains in his PM article called “A Feminist who Likes Guys“:

“Kay Hymowitz is a Planned Man’s friend. This brilliant journalist and scholar likes real Men, and is firmly on the side of doing right by them.  Her love for man is conditional.   She does not care much for knuckle dragging troglodytes.  And she thinks too many guys are taking a pass on real manhood for adolescent pursuits.

Within the feminist camp, this places her within the far too small camp of those known as Equity Feminists; those who, in opposition to the Movement’s mainstream, refuse to see human progress as a zero sum game.  Kay is all about empowering the development of Girls to Women, and they’re getting their just desserts in both the private and public spheres.  But she also knows that if we do it right—and we can—we all rise together.”

“Kay Hymowitz is in the Pantheon of Grande Dames.   As men, we have all benefited from her good sense about what might be called equality between the sexes American Style.”

– Guy Shepherd


Some background on Kay:

She is the William E. Simon Fellow at the Manhattan Institute and a contributing editor of City Journal. She writes extensively on childhood, family issues, poverty, and cultural change in America.

The best way for Planned Men to get to know her and her work is to start with her book, Manning Up: How the Rise of Women Has Turned Men into Boys.

She is also the author of Marriage and Caste in America: Separate and Unequal Families in a Post-Marital Age (2006), and Liberation’s Children: Parents and Kids in a Postmodern Age (2004), among others. She has written for the New York TimesWashington Post, Wall Street Journal, The New Republic, New York Newsday, Public Interest, The Wilson Quarterly, and Commentary.

What Kay Hymowitz has to say about men, women and “equity feminists”:

Here are Kay’s thoughts from the same Guy Shepherd article:

“In the 21st century, boys grow up to become men in a social world that would be completely foreign to their fathers and their grandfathers – and in fact, to the men in any previous culture you can name. It’s a world in which women have achieved an extraordinary level of equality in school, in the once male-only workplace, in government, and in both public and private spaces. That’s the good news, as they say. The bad news is that women’s success has shredded all of the traditional rules and scripts that men had for understanding, relating to, and partnering with them. The #metoo movement has only added to everyone’s confusion.

“For men the questions are especially basic: How should a man be? We know “toxic masculinity” is out of style, so what is good masculinity?”

Trust us, you are an “Equity Feminist” too: 

Here’s how Guy explains it in his PM story “Feminine Thought is Not of One Mind“:

“Most women…are equity feminists and they hold certain truths in common with Planned Man.”

– Guy Shepherd

1) Human Equality.  All means All.  Men and women. And to bring everyone in the room—all God’s equal offspring:  all sexes, all persuasions. Planned Man is for equity humanism.

2) A just, progressive society walks the shared talk. A workplace free of Harvey Weinstein and his quid pro blow economics.

Disclaimer: Planned Man does not like nor defend such men.  Seeing sex—and life—through the lens of power—ain’t our thing.   Human equality is our thing.

3)   Turn about is not fair play. Feel free to screw Harvey but leave Bob in accounting alone.

Group Guilt is a ugly, untrue, unfair and dangerous path.  Sadly, we are on it but at least we know how to get off of it.



More From Kay Hymowitz

Kay Hymowitz
Follow Kay Hymowitz