A Win-Win-Win Solution for Men, Women and Society
Guy took our cause and went through the simple process that made it a plan — and did so on tape. Verdict: Easy-peasy, no reason to get queasy. Tweet
This is a gift that just keeps on giving—but only when you want it to. An act of shared responsibility.
Plus, it's a plan almost as simple as sex itself, and the women in your life will love you for it.
The Guardian just published a wonderful piece by a female author calling for feminists of the world to unite and promote the cause of men getting vasectomies. Her reasoning is solid. The pill is great and all, but it is shouldered exclusively by women and leaves them in control of which direction your life will take once the fun is over. It makes perfect sense that after you have decided that you don’t want any more children, it’s a smart move to have a V — for your sake and for your partner’s health. Presently, there are 500,000 men who elect to have a V every year. If men were better sports this number would be a multiple of that
We’d like to make a broader appeal to men and to the women who love men. We think men should seriously start thinking about getting a vasectomy at 18. And just as with a tattoo, you can get one earlier with a parental waiver.
Guy, have you lost your mind? Nope.
Before you get the V, we recommend—and so will any good doctor—that you fill a cup or three of best swimmers at the peak of their power and put them in a secure freezer.
That thing we share together is a potent and dangerous weapon. Within it is the power of life and death. Such a weapon should be safely stored and unsheathed only after careful deliberation and with eyes wide open to the responsibility that comes with creating and nurturing a life from conception to productive adulthood.
The pursuit of pleasure does not always end well. “Oops! I’m pregnant” is a statement with real personal consequences for your life and for the lives of others. We see a market solution on-hand for men and for the women who love us and have our best interests in mind.
Go online to Dadi or Legacy and order one of their harvesting kits, which comes with a free year of freezer storage for your stuff. Fill the container with the gift of yourself and send it back. Wait for the test results, which checks out the health—number, speed and shape— of your aquamen. All good? Have them put in the freezer.
That thing we share together is a potent and dangerous weapon.
Then make an appointment with a “no-scalpel, reversible” urologist. The procedure is covered by most insurance plans. The guy that did mine—Dr. Doug Stein—has done over 50,000 of these procedures. He charges $590 if you lack insurance. I’m paying cash out of principle.
There’s a charge for freezing your swimmers, but for less than $100 per year you can get sexual freedom without any unintended human consequences. Keep the intentional act of bringing life into the world under lock and key. Legacy offers a Forever plan for $3,999 that allows for three samples and 50 years of cryo-storage. See range of options here. And if you are worried a circuit breaker might go bad and you’ll lose your future self to heat, their practice is to split your deposit between two secure locations. Each sample gives you four attempts at having a kid. Their basic rule of the thumb is every single contribution ought to be enough to have one child. The odds of having more children increases as the age of the donor decreases.
If you are sexually active and having a kid at this time of your life is not your intent, indulge me in a thought experiment:
A man’s relationship to this thing between our legs is conflicted. It rarely has your or society’s best interests in mind. It comes out of the factory in Ghangis Khan mode. Whatever amount of blood is required for an erection is also the amount required for the proper functioning of the host’s reasoning and ethics. There is much in the adage “a stiff dick has no conscience.” Or another favorite: A man is only as good as his options.
A stiff dick rebels against his host’s interests. By nature, it has the wisdom of Nick Cannon—an outlier active during COVID who welcomed into the world four children from 3 different women in one year. Living in Nick Cannon mode does not bode well, even for Nick, his partners and especially his children. (What’s the over/under on Nick Cannon dying broke? Does he live in California were prenups don’t hold up in court? Will he discover regret in three or five years?)
A man’s reproductive organs are a world-changing mix of pleasure and procreation. A double tap of orgasm, followed, nine months later, nature willing, the birth of a human being who comes swaddled in responsibilities and obligations. Nature is a bitch that way.
Looking in the review mirror of my own sexual history, I would definitely see the Dadi-plan as incredible insurance policy and structured product for young man’s sexual and reproductive pursuits.
It’s a perfect eat-your-cake-and-have-it-too solution to a huge problem that affects men, women, children and society.
So join us in our sexual revolution. Women like it. You can handle it. (I had the procedure yesterday and taped it for your forthcoming viewing edification.) Your sexual future is yours after a few minutes and few hundred dollars. And if you don’t trust yourself to pay your freezer bill, your mother will make sure the payments are made because she wants deliberate grandkids.
Keep under lock and key the intentional act of bringing life into the word and go out there and have fun. Our plan does not protect men from VD. So be careful where you put that thing. Particularly if you are Nick Cannon.
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