“How do I find the best local burger?”
By Planned Manhood
PlannedMan

Every town and city has one great local burger joint; your job, should you decide to accept it, is to find it.

“How do I find the best local burger?”
Login to rate this post.

Highlights


When you're hungry, you might be thinking any burger will do.

But don't settle. The research is simple enough.

After all, you only have one lunch a day. So find the best.

And we know just where that place is.

You’re on the road and you want a burger.

How bad do you want it?

Because if you’re a lazy SOB and don’t really care if it’s the best but just good enough, the answer is simple:

Open your Yelp app and ask for “Best Burgers Near Me.” But be skeptical.

And be warned, depending on where you are, the list may include McDonald’s, Wendy’s or Hardee’s:

And also be warned that Yelp doesn’t think you’re willing to drive very far to get the best burger in town, because you can’t search more 5 miles away on the web or 20 miles away using the app:

If you’re willing to settle for burger-medicrocy, at least take the time to read our review of chain burger joints from best to worst.

On the other hand if you’re a burger lover and you really want the best damn burger, you’re willing to go work harder and go further to sink your teeth into the best local burger that money can buy.

But how do you find it?

Three rules:

Caution: The most popular burger joint may not be the best burger joint.

  1. Skip Google, Yelp, OpenTable and Trip Advisor:
    They’re for people want to go to the the most popular burger joint, not the best burger joint.
    And the most popular place is often the place that attracts the people who are most addicted to their phones.
    When a joint’s customers are addicted to their phones, they go online and cast lots of votes and write lots of reviews.
    But just because they know how to peck away at their tiny little screens doesn’t mean they know a great burger from all the rest.
  2. Figure out the right local guys to ask instead:
    This may take a little work, but if it’s not fun, you’re not doing it right.
    Every town and city will be slightly different, but the right kinds of candidates usually include:

    • Crowded parking lots at lunch.
    • Guys in groups on motorcycles or bikes; because they make it a point to ride together somewhere to grab some great food to eat.
    • Guys in trucks with dogs in the back; because these guys usually know everyone and everything that’s going on around town.
    • Older guys at a golf course; but skip the younger guys because they will go for the most popular place they read about on their phones.
  3. Under no circumstances should you ask any of these guys:
    • Guys in suits
    • Guys in expensive sports cars
    • Guys in SUVs that are just too damn clean.

THE LATEST

SnipFlix Documentary: “The Vasectomist”

Six Great Coming-of-Age Classics

Pop-Quiz: What’s the Toughest Sport to Play?

Why your son needs a job at a hair salon.

Bernie Goldberg Meets Jason Whitlock…Finally