Both will be better served if you see the other as a “cell mate.” When you say, “I do” say it to your soulmate.
Since the miracle of Cana, the three rings of dating and mating—engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering—held steady. That is until the 1960s and the advent of the Pill. That's when everything changed.
How can you tell there's a civil war coming? Suddenly, nobody around you is civil.